It's only been a week and i've already broken my no summer randoms rule twice.
he threw my burrito on the ground and said im too drunk. fuck that guy.
I threw all my money on the ground and said it was for homeless people and fell down the stairs
I'm with the hottest fuckin fire fighter right now. I'm ready to fake my own death.
Haha ohman remember when I peed in your blender? Gotta love college.
YOU DID WHAT???
Some rando guy literally just put my shoes on and tied them for me because I'm drunk... Is this what it feels like to be a princess?
Just want to apologize again for asking to spot your form in the shower.
I remember puking but I don't remember where. PSA: don't go barefoot around the house
Are you planning on wandering into construction sites drunk and falling down 6' holes?
probably
but I truly enjoy making out with my best friend more than my boyfriend
If you saw or spoke to me yesterday can you message me. Trying to make a timeline of the day I was too drunk to remember
I am having telepathic thoughts with my cat. He loves me and wants me to blow his nose
Im just confused who has their mom break up with someone
You are talking to me during sexting hours. Be careful, innuendos are taken seriously
I party with great urgency now.
Randomize
