I haven't worn deodorant in like three days and have been laying around in my underwear listening to music and drinking. I think i've made my own Bonnaroo in my apartment.
she's just sitting in a corner ripping all of the filters off her menthols
a slip n slide in 50degree weather was the 2nd dumbest thing i have ever done. the 1st was hitting the wooden fence i believed was supposed to "help us stop"
you spent the like half the night trying to figure out the puzzles on the back of the captn crunch box
Just used the salt in the bottom of my mcdonalds bag from last night on the eggs i made this morning. Way too hungover for this
WAIT U DIDN'T FEED THE SQUIRREL?
If her picture on my phone wasn't mostly of her breasts, I'd never pick up the phone when she calls.
I just remember her telling me "Hi, my names Kaissa and I'm a lesbian" over and over and over and over again as I was crying.
Already puke and ralleyd and dressed like a bear.
We literaly had to peel your fingers off the jose cuervo bottle and lock it in someones room
They left me stranded on the side of the road with a table and five gallons of water. They said it was all I really needed to survive. People are staring
You grinded and hooked up with a middle aged tiger woods look-a-like with manboobs. Tequila isn't for you.
I just want a boyfriend who will have sex to Disney Pandora.
Ok, stop saying "youths." You're 23.
We just broke up and deleting his dick pics is the hardest thing I've ever had to do.
Randomize
