i know ur right I'm sorry I'm stupid and incompitent look I can't even spell incompetent right! Fuck!
You guys sftrill at mcdondalds?!!!!
Yes.
fuckin bring me a cheseburgeria
Apparently last night I sat at the bar with an upside down sharpie lightning bolt on my forehead, yelling "It's Harry Potter's birthday! Let me be on the qudditch team!" And I kept calling the bartender Dobby. There are videos.
Managed to discreetly puke out of a moving streetcar window, in front of no less than a dozen people. Nobody saw/said anything. I feel like a legit local now.
I just wanna be craddled in his arms and spoon fed applesauce..
that's the most romantic thing you've ever said.
I just puked so hard I pissed myself. Outta my ass. I just won hangover of the century.
But he does seem to be getting proper humping etiquette down. So there's progress.
We got caught having sex in the bathroom by my professor. In accordance with tradition, we still brofisted. I think my grade went up considerably.
I'm like 87% sure some random guy starting biting my ear after grinding me for like 30 seconds... I feel suprisingly unconcerned
Like theyre better than no shoes. I'm sitting her balls naked playing xbox in nothing but crocs with the fur
We need to drink more. Just think how awesome it would be to wake up in a trailer and NOT remember how wee got here.
you said "how could you not want to hook up with me when I have these abs" and then proceeded to rip your shirt off in the middle of the bar. I'm pretty sure you were hammered.
JESUS
His roommates came in the room and were throwing snowballs at us while we were hooking up.
He said his name was Tony, after last night I will refer to him as Tiny
You were supposed to catch herpes, not feelings!!!
Randomize
