her name is jenna, so i wanna cunt punt her
that's how i am about ashleys and britneys
so Brent and I ordered you a drink then realized you don't live here. I drank it.
My workout was carrying 2 cases home from the grocery. It's Bowl Week.
I'm at taco bell and they have a hiring sign asking "do you like to melt things?" clearly they only want the ambitious.
Her parents walked in on us. So for my birthday they bought me a blow-up doll with their daughters face on it. I don't know what to think right now.
I saw you eating fruit and doing shots off people passed out
We need to play Chardee MacDennis. Contact me when you have an available date. This is not a question.
Wake up, take the dog to the trails, puke in the woods. More days should start like this.
theres a new barista at starbuck holy fuck she's hot
i want to face-plant into her vagina
I walked in and all four of you were covering your heads under the blanket singing waterslides in unison.
I just had sex with the megalodon show on in the background and it was just as magical as it sounds
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
I once broke a mans heart just to get laid by a premature ejaculator
She has a girlfriend too.. we decided that two cheats equal eachother out to zero. with our flawed grasp on algebra and the bottle of jack we were passing back and forth the logic seemed airtight.
help. his tongue is stuck. Its not what you think. Hurry.
Randomize
