last night i used 411 to try and contact britney spears.
dollar well spent
have u ever looked at the reflection of the water n watched the poop come out of u?
why can't you just be normal
Pizza is the life boat of my drunk Titanic
I just found glitter on my vibrator... whatever we're doing has to stop
Just got the orientation leader spot. For the first two days, I will be one of the best looking guys on campus. The freshman girls will be so disappointed they settled for me when everyone else comes back.
He started making shapes and faces with his cock and balls.... apparently if you wrap the shaft with your balls and turn it 90 degrees to the left it looks like a hamburger
You just kept saying "I want my babies to look like you."
maybe next time you'll take an ex boyfriend warning you that she's batshit crazy as a warning instead of a challenge
and you will have a crown and it will be made of penises and all will bow before you and your glorious penis crown
I have full custody of my vagina however you are granted visiting hours
Whoa, I am aware of WAY too many squirrels right now...
Hold on - sidebar. My best friend just threw a 40 pack of condoms through my window.
All I got was pictures of my boss and dicks. So, that was the end of snapchat.
Sorry i ignored you for so long. I think my vibrator is broken.
Your friend was nice but you didn't have to bang her in my kitchen...just sayin.
Randomize