There's guys at my school running around throwing potatoes shouting "remember the famine." makes me proud to be Irish.
I was really sad when you left and cried. And i don't know what a face promise is, but apparently i made you make one.
I really want to go out tonight but part of me wants to be able to honestly tell the judge tomorow that I didn't
he went up stairs with nothing on but calvin klein's and an eskimo hat, said hi to her dad, got a doughnut, and left like it was an everyday thing
What can I say, your life is charmed. I'm on the couch trying to decide whether or not to puke again.
There's gotta be a happy medium between the guys who only want to sleep with me and the ones that respect me too much to try to sleep with me.
Even the bar was yelling boobs, so of course the shirt came off
Not rlly sure. Might just drink and sleep. Gotta wake up for my last rabies shot lol
Oh my god. He likes it up the butt. But loves womanly support. Omg. Its bad. Its bad. Ive had too much whiskey for this to be ANYthing except bad.
I hate it when the guy who runs the chicken and waffles truck is convinced that I run a cult.
that is the opposite of a normal text message.
unless you have a dick and you were thinking of chopping that off
I'm convinced he's the patron saint of oral sex
I sent her a video on Snapchat of me cumming, with a Father's Day snap filter that said "#1 Dad".
He climbed on the counter and announced it was time for something called The Cocktacular and all the girls immediately left. He cockblocked the entire fraternity!
Can we skype so I'm not drinking alone?
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