just do him I won't tell jon
um i'm guessing you meant to send this to tina, thanks for the support in our relationship you whore
I was wasted and lost so I called the cops and asked for directions. It seemed logical at the time
The theme is smores and alcohol. Dress appropriately.
You missed a lot. I drank contact solution thinking it was water, vodka thinking it was water and some unidentified substance that reminded me of pine sol thinking it was water..
I used puppy pads next to the couch for her to throw up on....
It was the textbook our-balls-touched-while-engaged-in-a-threesome-with-our-bosses-wife conversation.
It amazes and alarms me I'm not shocked to read that.
He got cut off by the bartender. So he kept buying people drinks of they would i get him a drink. Before you know it him and 8 people were outside the bat trying to get people. To by them drinks
How many band members does it take to become The Band Slut? I think I might be dangerously close
I can't trust your balls anymore.
You know it's time to call it a night when every guy in the bar (all 3 of them) have seen you naked at one time or another.
we are currently pregaming for our walk to the liquor store.
step one: admitting you have a problem. complete.
How do I un-spend everything I bought last night? Seriously...was a penis shaped piñata and enough tequila to fill my bathtub really that necessary?
At least you can say you've literally dumped money down the drain
this vacation is helping with my sexual bucket list so much. threesome, deaf guy, and outdoor sex all accomplished.
She looked up and said "I like this." I asked "what do you like?" she said "penis."
I told her I wanted to go swimming and she responded with jello shots, taking off her clothes, and jumping into the pool...I think I'm in love
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