I just got back to Nicks and I shoul dnot have drank this much when I have to work at 7AM!!!!!
were not allowed back there because i puked on the waitresses foot while trying to order another round. for myself.
Just saw the liqour store owner get into a mercedes, almost proud to be responsible for that
ok so I'm texting you now like I promised instead of drunktexting aaron and telling him how badly I want his cock tonight. aren't you proud?
this is Aaron, hi
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm going to get like 25 drinks at their wedding and just leave them sitting around or give them to hobos.
You don't seem to appreciate the rareness of his junk.
Send me a picture. I'm more of a visual learner.
STOP LICKING HIS MUSTACHE
Are you still feeling it? I'm in the bathtub. The water doesn't work but it's okay because I'm wearing pants.
I just want to lay in a bed of egg mcmuffins and cry
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
DAMMIT Im supposed to be running a company not discussing dick piercings!
And besides a nice relationship, I just really want to get laid damnit
Today one of my patients offered me pot brownies. Medical school worth it. Living the dream.
When I finally came to, I was in the DJ booth wearing his headphones while he was spinning. That's all I got.
I put miralax in my rum/coke. Go hard or go home.
last night you made out with a 19 year old on a bar and i woke up with a swede in my bed. lets just say that never happened.
Randomize