Wow so rude I was trying to have an orgy later but whatever
I think having sex with you would be a great treat for us
you guys got to bein so kosher and go with the flow
Having sex with her was like reading the Wall Street Journal.
her last google searches are 'cheap african safari' and 'what does lion taste like'
I just claimed my unemployment in Vegas. This seems wrong.
I want a meaningful relationship and i wont get one if i keep giving him blow jobs in my basement while watching family guy.
all of his pictures were taken on a library computer, how did you even consider fucking him?
I cant prove it..but im almost positive that you were just outside my window watching me while eating out of a bag of Cheetos...
I had a guy present me his prison release form this morning as id
The guy I wanted to make out with just got beat up, let's roll.
There's just something about a dollar tree pregnancy test that screams THIS WASNT PLANNED!
I kinda wanna eat your hands right now.
Put down the everclear and go to bed.
Text me back. Urgent. It is a porta Keep the portal alive.
Is this the acid talking?
our friendships a beautiful delicate flower...that has been crushed by peni
You continued to run around saying "free the nipple" while "taste testing" every liquor on the premises.
I'm like, not good at living.
Randomize
