oh God, I have a dick of a middle schooler
Am I texting you while being used as a stripper pole by two half-naked women? hint: I am.
You are softly singing to the wall while slow dancing with it. I feel as though you should discontinue this behavior.
Can't decide which I like more. Telling a girl she's pregnant or telling her she has herpes. It's the little things that make medicine tolerable.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We're having chugging races with long island ice tea, I won. To often
He bought a sex swing! He's building the playground of my dreams!!!!
Sadly he is straight as an arrow that is designed by a robot computer from the future with lasers.
This saddens me. Mostly because I want to see the schematics on that robot.
I disagree, if your last name is Weiner then the sending of dick pics should be mandatory. I'd give him a pass.
I really shouldn't have to tell you to stop banging your lightsaber on everything while we are in college.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
OMFG "ASS" JUST STARTED PLAYING ON MY PHONE VIA PANDORA AS IM IN THE CAR WITH A CONGRESSMAN FUCKKKK
Working nightshift means its never too early to start drinking- and you can quote me on that
All I remember is pissing by the garage and the next thing I know I'm on fire
Relax
It's hard to relax when a woman is waxing your asshole.
Do I masturbate or eat a pound of matazah. Alissa help what do I do??
I ran into the marine at the grocery store. Its like my vag and his penis have this way of finding each other when I least want it.
Randomize