Is it a little weird that I have a ridiculous urge to have sex while the theme song to the Pirates of the Carrbibbean blares in the background?
Dude, she DOES look like she'd give good head. No bottom jaw, I checked.
It's like having an annoying little brother who wants to have sex with you
Since my computer broke, i've been masterbating to girls gone wild. I feel like i'm in the 90's.
even if everyone didnt know them screaming eskimo brothers and high fiveing over my head kinda gave it away
Did she have bad breath? Bad breath makes you think of all the bad things in the world
Its pretty simple actually, if she texts me either Grr or Rawr it means she is horny and wants to bone. its a perfect system
I don't know what you're talking about but its dick galore in the tub. We will be getting poked tonight. Bring forks.
He was sleeping, but the way he was made him look like an adorable, fuzzy penis
I just want a sensitive guy who will get drunk with me then take me out to steal things. Is that too much to ask?
Checked my photo vault today... My self nudie folder is passing the 150 mark.
The weird thing is that you don't send them to anyone. You just keep them for yourself...
Stay strong! Remember we're too uncoordinated to be strippers to make money instead of being a nurse
Are you ok?!
I assume I've stopped bleeding because I haven't passed out, but can't verify currently.
Just almost drowned myself in the shower again. I need an adult.
I have just received a gold-medal-deserving sext. He wrote me a fucking novel. Not only am I incredibly turned on but I am beyond impressed. He is the sext god. I must bow to him.
Randomize
