So did the night end well for you?
I stole a traffic cone and drunk texted my sister because i couldn't think of any other girl to text
I have one brief flash of having his dick in my hand. that's all I remember.
Well, I guess this was as good a night as any to find out I don't know how to use my fire extinguisher.
She's a Laker fan, her sister is a Celtic fan... no matter who wins I'm getting a celebration bj from one of them!
I've created a drink called, "watching the sound of music with grandma." its straight vodka
The only reason we got away with streaking last time was cuz we had those miner hats
And after we debated politics. My dream come true: naked, just got done having great sex with a hot mixed guy, talking about why social welfare programs are a bad idea
I could not handle jail. And my very angry parents.
He sent me a slow motion video of him jerking off...it was so long (the video not his dick) even I felt awkward watching it alone
OK BUT WHO THE FUCK FORGTS A LIVE CHICKEN IN MY HOUSE
Remember that guy I fucked last month? Well I'm watching his dog this weekend while he's in the Bahamas with his girlfriend. What is my life
I'm gonna fight the coyote
Such a shame we didn't work out. We would've been a power couple producing NFL linemen :/
I'm going to start talking to Bill again, he has friends with boats which means we'll get to go on boats.
It’s a prereq for med school, so I hope the professor likes blow jobs
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