How is your vagina???
Double booked
With your butt?
Totes, candlesticks and all
Yay!!
we just decided that lesbian tuesdays are a must, as of tomorrow.
I can't go out tonight I need to save my money for important things.....like rogaine and ecstasy.
I watched the entire movie Forgetting Sarah Marshall before I realized it was in Spanish.
I doubt the Taliban would support fake nipples.
Dude. She told me she felt bad for not giving me more blojobs. HOW COULD THAT HAVE GONE BETTER?
its a nice change of pace not blacking out and actually remembering getting laid
We have a drunken confused pantless man in our apt. Boots.
Thank god for makeup because it looks like someone took a shit on my face
You kept trying to throw the grocery cart off the balcony.
I've woke up in his bed 4 out of the past 6 mornings. I feel like this might be the time to learn more about him then his first name and what kind of beer he drinks.
Also, what is a socially acceptable way to introduce a crossbow in public?
before the moonshine you were already braiding the bouncers beard -_-
It was like coming out my mothers vagina again in slow motion
Your clever response has earned you a blow job this week
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