drunk doesn't even begin to explain it. dude called him and said to bring you back because he'd already called dibs.
Just found a keg and a mini-bike in our garage, this couldn't possibly go wrong
just found a piece of pizza in my dresser.....i remember you saying you were going to save one for later so i'm assuming this is your doing
I think there was chlamydia in those woods.
What should I wear?
Uhhhhh...idk? it's a gay bar
I found something that says "i'm here to party, but not fuck guys."
bark. im thoroughly looking forward to kegs and eggs. next weekend should be pancakes and pinnical, then cereal and seagrams and then whiskey and waffles.
Mcdonalds hasn't even finished serving breakfast yet and u two are getting drunk?
He had a joint rolled for us when he picked me up. It's how ASU does romance
Nah, just ran around, pinned random men to walls, bit their lips of and booked it.
My walk of shame was 2 miles of feathers flying off of me, underwear in hand, and a homeless man telling me he'd pray for me. It was gold medal worthy.
when I called the strip club they said there was a note with my credit card. "girl who punched guy in throat" fuck daytona
Got drunk in Atlantic City Flagged down some guy with two wrapped tampons like road flares for a cigarette.
In honor of Super Tuesday, we should have the sex tonight.
I sent him a blank text because I didn't want to "drunk text" him.
I might be a bit longer... I found a hot guy at the grocery store, so I'm following him and buying stuff that he's buying
Randomize
