Her little brother was home, so we had to hook up while playing hide and seek with him
I have decided to cut my hair. This is based solely on the fact there is too much of it to clean vomit out every Sunday afternoon.
Im sending over a girl who thinks youre in the next twilight movie
your the best winggirl ever
he was wearing a tuxedo, i was naked...it's a long story.
I just want you to know that i just realized your the only friend i dont feel fat around.
Chances are I'll be there for your wedding. Camelbaks filled with jack and coke are appropriate attire, right?
If for no other reason than to cuddle with that puppy, you have to hook up with him again.
HOLY FUCK COMFIEST CHAIR EVER
I'm not going to be your wingman while you are in the hospital.
He carried you out but the best part is you kept saying "can't I keep dancing" as you were gushing blood
We literally solved our fight using cat pictures on Instagram. True love.
Can my mom come with to the bar? Prince just died and I feel like I need to take her out to cheer her up.
I blacked out in the cab last night... Cant remember getting in the front door, also i got into bed with my grandma.
you were acting out moves from the wwe, in a dress. then you sceamed "you can't see me" and ran out of the apt.
Well, if I'm gonna go gay, it's gonna be for NPH
Randomize
