It had been so long since my last time that it was easily a double helping of stomach pancakes. I think she was mildly impressed.
Just got cockblocked by coyotes. This would happen to me.
I woke up locked in the bar...this has redefined partying.
Curse you and your alcoholic milkshakes.
You're welcome.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
(540): I ran 10 miles and then took a dump behind a rock. What the fuck have you done with a hangover that's comparable?
You made her yell her own name while you were fucking so that you would remember it in the morning.
What alcohol should i drink Saturday to completely hate life?
Hey sorry about last night. can I come pick up my tooth?
nobody was home so I boiled the dildo
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The struggles of a small town man whore
I accidentally left my shirt at my booty calls house. He washed it & hung it up for me in his closet. I can't decide if that's sweet or creepy
There's no such thing as shame in your world, is there?
Im blaming it on six shots of Jack, loneliness and a chemical imbalance. That's the best I can think of...
Ok. Yes. He has a tiny penis. But he also has a trust fund.
Come on baby if you haven't had a Charleston chew eatin out of your ass you just ain't livin right.
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