Saw a Delta Zeta recruitment poster today. On it, somebody added, "All you need is your daddy's credit card and a lack of self-respect."
And people are going to start dressing like that in public, it's just ridiculous, the goths and now the GAGAs
i took my goldfish out of his bowl last night and put him in my bed
you'll never guess what i found when i got home...
a cake, in the toilet
I'll be honest, not actually surprised to find half a Big Mac box and bits of broken security glass by the sofa.
sea world and a strip club? BEST DAY EVER!
Just used my front-facing camera to check my pupils. Technology!
Just watched a girl fall down the stair and be to drunk to get up. The only stair in the bar. It's like watching a turtle on it's back.
Did I send you a naked snap the other day with a fat blunt in my mouth with the caption "$1200 bitches!" ?
I just turned down an invite to sit on a face. IDK who I am.
What? Are you sick?
There's a pregnant girl taking shots of apple juice
Am i obligated to tell my sister her girlfriend was my one night stand three months ago?
My mom said "I saw the signs you guys were high, so I made the spaghetti"....so ya, I'd say she definitely knew
She lured me back to her place with pizza and tits. I was totally helpless
There's so many drinking games in the Olympics.
you missed out this chick was licking her paddle
Randomize
