For real. Like, if I ever had to choose a last meal, I would just choose to get high and eat whatever was around.
We walked in and the first thing we heard was, "OH SHIT! White chicks!" Naturally, I made some new male friends.
She never called back. Financed a fleshlight.
so i just calculated it and i would need to score 150% on this final to pass
Just got off the phone with poison control. They're more concerned about our alcohol intake than that the beer bong was last cleaned with pine sol.
just threw up on my speech test, so much for a great semester
I expect to be treated like a lady. Even If your sticking it in my ass.
You're probably reading this when you wake up from your "nap" in the front yard. Maybe next week you should go to class, and not start Thirsty Thursday at 9:30 in the morning.
She said I was the most selfish person in bed she's ever been with and she's fucked Tucker Max.
After everything you did, you followed it with "Oh God, that's something a high person would do. But I'm not high." So yeah, you're not getting near my stash again.
Well it ended with everyone taking a bite out of a raw potato and a girl crying because her boyfriend wouldn't bring her any grape juice. So yeah...I'd say the night was a success.
I'm having a hard time existing right now. When I figure out how it works ill be over.
She just asked what would happen if you put a vacuum in your butt and turned it on. These are our conversations.
Only I could go on a date with one guy, have a beer with a different guy and go home with the guy im trying to avoid. I have a talent or a problem.
If he refers to me as slump buster one more fucking time.
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