do you think it i'm gay because i was in a 3 way lastnight?
well not if you dont touch the other dude and concentrate on the chic
what chic?
Got bored today and made list of places in apt I want to have sex. One includes opening and coming out the window.
If I die, please delete the word file entitled "Rainy Day"
well I washed the adderal like an idiot. the capsules broke but the beads inside were intact. so my landlady came in and caught me licking the dryer lint screen
Nothing says "This dudes gotta go" better than a boner on your back waking you @ 5 in the morning
my mom used to put diet coke in my bottle. i can pretty much handle anything.
Using the ceiling fan to slice the hotdogs in mid-air can only be contributed to our liberal use of 1800.
They walked in to the store, ripped up the phone book, and left. Can we get on their level?
I woke up smelling like the ciroc you tried pouring into my mouth last night. I think my clothes are still soaked
don't worry about it. We passed around the "get jeff bail" can 10 min. After you left. We currently have around $400. May I say that people here at the dorms really love you.
Nothing says walk of shame like leather pants in daylight
I just saw a commercial for God of War and heard the nickname he gave my vagina.
My kid made a secret wish that you have a baby... Make good choices today!
idk he wanted to trade sex for a triple order of hashbrowns
AND YOU SAID NO?????????
i couldn't be more explicit if i hit him upside the head with a dildo
I would offer you moral support, but I have questionable morals..
Randomize
