I trust that you have thought of something completely illegal for us to do this weekend.
I think he liked me better when I only opened my mouth to suck his dick.
i walked outside and you were driving up the stairs to her apartment
Next time he asks to wax your nipple while you're passed out I promise I'll be sober enough to intervene.
You gave me your shirt to use as a napkin every time I spilled beer on myself. Before we went to the bar.
Back. Waiting on Thong the shuttle bus driver. THONG
I just had my first lesbian experience. Out of spite.
Try eating a sub blackout with your uncle. It's not easy ok
You're never the same once you're dry humped on the frat house floor
Congrats on dating a convict, there's no fitbit badge for that one.
nobody put me to bed and I ended up peeing on a tree and got written up
Like, when both of your dads are drag queens you're bound to have some amazing Halloween makeup
so how about you dont randomly call my mother during parties?
He ate me out in the passenger seat of his Range Rover in a Tim Hortons parking lot. I could hear “oh canada” on the radio from a nearby school as I came. Most patriotic orgasm ever!
The ass gains better be worth it
Randomize
