he spit gasoline on a tiki torch to impress a girl. he caught on fire but did get laid. success.
I miss him.. What the hell did I get myself in to? I guess it will get better with time.
No. Just liquor. Time's no good.
Dude, I would hit that so hard that whoever could pull me out would become the king of England
Just used my last prints at the library for brackets instead of final reviews. Hello March.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Due to our sore throats we are now doing bong hits with cranberry juice to sooth it.
You were throwing ham at people telling them you were the sandwhich fairy
He passed out naked in my bathroom, then took a shower, then passed out again and then took another shower. Last time I let my brother visit.
TONGUES ARE JUST MEAT TENTACLES IN OUR MOUTHS OMG
HOW ABOUT I DON'T WAKE UP TO THESE TYPES OF TEXTS
I was screaming out for people to gather the townsmen and the mayor so we could hang him
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I heard them banging and it sounded like he was trying to stuff a fucking coconut into her
Everyone says I win the strip club
The shrooms were awesome. Everyone's bones in their face looked so beautiful! Everyone had great face structures.
Let's just say if my bucket list had "fngered in the middle of a club by a complete stranger while being sprayed by UV paint" then that is well and truly ticked off.
He sent me a text saying his breakfast today was leftover mead and some fruit salad
I feel like 20 angels jizzed in my mouth. This cupcake is DELICIOUS!
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