so... how was it???
he had bart simpson sheets. he had itunes on shuffle and "don't worry be happy" started playing when he took his boxers off. sad to say i was neither worried nor happy
my goal in life is to wake up with my underwear on
Flying to Orlando on the 7th is cheaper than the 8th by like three margaritas.
This is the LAST time i'm accepting the excuse "tequila made me do it". Even tequila thinks buying all of nickelback's itunes singles is fucking retarded
im sleeping in a hamic at a mansion. best hangover ever
Only your wife would write 'for deposit only' on the back of that $1500 check knowing full and well our capabilities of spending it on strippers and booze
Two dudes. Loud music. Dancing shirtless possibly naked. Why would I ever need cable?!
be warned: you might find a baby hampster in my bra
Today is the day I die from a hangover. I love you, mom. Farewell.
Everyone's impressed that I actually got pee all over his car since I'm a girl and they're a little curious..
What is your friends name that I hooked up with? ....I think j found his credit card under my bed
how do i say "cradle the balls" in Italian
Stranded. In bathroom stall. No toilet paper. I repeat NO TOILET PAPER! Assistance needed asap. GO! GO! GO!
Wait... where the hell did you even find a live OCTOPUS, let alone green eggs and ham?
I need like a billion tiny bottles of alcohol to put in the patron pinatas
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