I feel like I am becoming dumber sitting here in class than I would be sitting on the couch smoking weed.
No vaginas are yucky and I don't think you're old enough to handle one yet
Threesome last night. Not that cool, you tend to pick a favorite.
He was so drunk that he tried to backflip off a baby chair.. How do you think that ended?
I have no idea what i drank..i remember dancing and ass grabbing..u falling. Headbutts. Trying not to puke. And deja vu.
Well, both are illegal but one involves my vagina a whole lot less.
How did your new apartment party go last night?
I'm really happy i have a bigger bathroom to puke in.
So, I picked up my 7 ft tall lamp post and used it to close my door. I feel quite accomplished.
I need Mexican food. Like, I'd take it through a needle at this point. It's totally worth the track marks.
Awkward sister question: which game of thrones female left would you fuck?
We went to Olive Garden so high we didn't talk and managed to be awkward enough for the waiter to ask if it was our first date
I apparently got up in the middle of the night after fucking him and started looking for you under piles of his clothing
Currently looking up Winnie-the-Pooh porn.
My horoscope should say: you're an alcoholic, get help today, Pisces
What the fuck was I thinking eating an entire tub of potato salad on acid. My stomach today bro
Randomize
