I dinstinctly remember making out to "I believe I can fly" and waving my arms like a bird to the beat.
I am totally the chick from Intervention who barfs up wine and then re-eats it.
you threw up in the bushes next to the ABC store and kept saying "you're home, blueberry vodka, you're home!"
I went golfing for the first time today!! Aren't you proud?
Driving a golf cart around all day with a keg attatched to the back doesn't exactly count as golfing
I wanna throw up and cum in that order
I only remember singing the Captain Planet theme song on our way to the bars.
He tried to make small talk to hide the fact that he was struggling to unhook my bra... at least he tried right?
I'm playing drinking games with a boy who looks like Liam Hemsworth. I think I'm fine.
I almost don't wanna have sex with her because I'm afraid she'll steal my hat
I should probably eat a Plan B. Pill for breakfast. Happy Halloween.
Maybe? I'm not shaving my pubes for a maybe type of night.
There is a pool of ranch salad dressing in my purse...I know thats always been something you've wanted to try..so don't even act like you didn't do this.
He passed out in my car.
What's the problem?
HE'S STILL IN MY FUCKING CAR.
I'm at home, drunk, and I just called the guy I lost my virginity to and invited him to my wedding.. I've got to stop drinking by myself.
I've seen too many naked penises for this to be a normal Monday morning
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