I texted him about a book we both like. I was expecting a "ya great book... let's bone" response. It didn't work
as soon as his mom opened the door to let me in the house she asked if i would like a shot
it's gonna be a great weekend
he said that weed should be legal but that particular bong shouldn't be. i stared at a clock for an hour and a half after i ripped. so logically, i completely agree.
So you used a whole package of smoked meat last night. Didn't eat it, just took it out and put it all over the fridge.
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I found your bra. How you get it off the satellite dish is your problem.
If you see my mugshot on the news tomorrow, its not what you think
You told me if you could get your shoes on, you deserved a coke and rum. We never made it to the party.
I was basically shocked at how calmly you accepted my violently shoving a french fry in your mouth.
I LOVE YOU NO MATTER HOW MANY BALLS YOUVE SUCKED
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You told the cop you where the star of the Track team and tried to run away. So yeah, i'm not surprised.
Is this the point in which we come to terms with our lesbianism or is that after you send me more ass pics...
We just broke my bed mid-sex, laughed, then continued. If that isn't true love I don't know what is.
He wrote me a Haiku titled, "Let me touch your butt".
.......he just venmo charged me for the burrito I was eating while he broke up with me
I slept with my wedding DJ..... I think this means my life has come full circle
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