omg kevin jonas gave his bride a glass slipper..could he be any gayer then he is now
he is so gay. he makes clay aiken look straight. what is wrong with the lady that married him? kevin must be envious of her balls
He considered it romantic when he told me mid-blow job that no matter what happens, he will "never forget how good of a dick I suck". Verbatim.
we used the bottom of a tampon for coke since no one had a 20 on them. My life has resisted to this.
I love that the power of margaritas brought us back together.
i don't know. but im upstairs in the closet with a burger i found in their fridge
I'm so hungover I literally am considering drinking from the fishtank to avoid getting out of bed.
He ended our Skype call with, "I'm going to poop and then go play my ukulele in the park."
I just watched how this is made for an hour because I was tooo high to remember what they were making. it was like a prize at the end.
We exchanged snapchat usernames instead of numbers. Is that what America has come to?
I'm watching porn in spanish. Thats studying right?
So... I woke up on a bench with a honey bun on my chest.
Someone broke into my car last night. Didn't take anything, even left the beer in my backseat. They need to get their priorities straight, obviously.
Don't do him, he's a Dolphins fan! A FUCKING DOLPHINS FAN!
So, I just ordered a breathalyzer for this weekend. I figured if I'm getting shitfaced, I should at least be scientific about it.
He just took off his shirt. I'll text you later.
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