I reminded them that I didn't puke and I cleaned yours up! So huh!
and then he ordered a "diet and rum" like the most important part of the drink was the diet.
Joe is yelling at the trees again.
Either he has two lazy eyes or he really likes my tits..
Can I have the boy from 16 and pregnant's next baby???
I'm wearing an NBA shooting sleeve while jerking off...and yes my arm has stayed warm
you told that cab driver that when the 3 of us come togehter it means happiness and love
You were sitting in the tub, clothed, squirting my KY all over yourself. You said "it's warm." then passed out.
I can feel my teeth in 4 dimensions. I shouldnt be this high at 8 in the morning.
Conversations we need to have while high 1) how mermaids reproduce 2) if blind people hallucinate what do they see 3) reincarnation
some dude just accurately guessed my height and bra size.. that is cup AND inches around. creepy, yet impressive
It turned from Netflix and chill to cringeworthy YouTube videos and chill. At least he's honest.
It has now been 10 days since we last saw Sebastians penis
I’ve officially bought the ticket for my future dick appointment 😂
Will you PLEASE get your mom to stop telling me I'd make a great husband? She knows I'm gay, right?!
I know, but she really likes you. Have you met my brother yet?
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