what kind of morning-after breakfast implies 'thanks for the sex, but i'm not gonna call you ever again'?
he's got a countert top full of yard sale blenders so id say maragita wednesdays is a go.
I think it was you who decided that coming home at 3AM and cooking eggs topless was the best way to end our night. Eating the scrambled eggs off each other's boobs, that was ellie's idea
I think they're German
Just say lederhosen and see what happens
Drunk girl in a bikini just tried to bite my face, it's officially spring break
Then he unzipped his pants and whispers, " oohhh, look out!"
Are you sure he's still you're boyfriend when you're sober?
Grab some lube and condoms and you get a free shirt? College is weird
I don't know how guys can take themselves seriously when they see themselves naked
this is a save-me-from-tijuana-tequila-and-hoookers booty call. if i don't hear from you by 8pm i'm grabbing my passport
if i'm not back tomorrow call the embassy
Good!!! I'm so proud of you for not snorting alcohol. Big girl steps.
All I know is I woke up cuddling a jar of peanut butter....
i told someone my fallback plan was to be a slutty bartender and i needed the practice as i straddled them to pour a shot
Did you really think putting a napkin over your head would make you giving him a bj less obvious?
Ha. Yeah that's all I found you with this morning. Butt ass naked w my robe across your lap and your arms thrown back in handcuff position.
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