I have a drunk 6th sense to lyrics of songs i dont know. It only works when i dance..
So he saw that playlist i made with his name as the title. i think he's creeped out that I have 106 songs that remind me of him
If a man's penis is referred to as "the family jewels" does that make a woman's vagina a jewelry box?
There is so much to learn about oneself from autofill.
So if you want this MFM threesome thing to happen the other guy is here and willing
Typical Sunday afternoon purchase of condoms and a helium tank.
I'm pretty sure I just crapped out my pancreas. I have 2 of those, right?
You are the only person I have ever seen offer your other drink to the bouncer on two fors night
Bouncers are people too...giant angry people
He peed my bed and tried to say it was just the wine. The red wine. On white sheets. He's not a good liar.
I'm right down the road from AJ's old house and I'm getting mixed feelings. My vagina is remembering good dick. But the rest of me is remembering horrible times.
On a scale of 1-10, how inappropriate is it to sneak into someone's box of sex toys and put googly eyes on their vibrator?
I'm dangerously close to tossing this whole "morals" bullshit and swan-diving into the fuckboy lifestyle.
I got a message the other day that just said “great tits”
A gentleman AND a scholar
Turns out naked twister is less fun than it sounds. I can never look Lee in the eye again. But Aimee's boobs are glorious.
we went to the skate park then back to her house for dinner, and somehow that ended with her making me blueberry pancakes at 2am
Randomize
