Id pretty much put it in anything at this point. Jello. Dogs. 12 year old boys
How do you get eyebrow wax out of your butthole region?
The fact that you aren't ashamed to ask that is the reason I will give you the answer. Under the sink there is a bottle of wax remover. Throw my waxing kit away as well.
then mid-sex he looked at me and said "i hope this is as good for you as it is for me" and kept going.
Your scrotum should have touched every square inch of that place by now. Start with the water fountain.
Dude i'm seriously thinking about his nipples.
well at that point we were just fucking to keep warm.
she has her graduation year in her skype name, it's like a constant reminder that she's jail bait.
I never thought I'd say this, but there is a life threatening amount of rumpleminz in our freezer
Pretty sure I can show you the text you sent me stating some interest in my penis entering your mouth if said circumstances were met.
We can see it once so I can see the whole movie, then I'll go see it with him so I know when the boring parts are and I can have sex with him during those parts
Benefits of having to stay in jail for the weekend: learned how to make my own make up out of colored pencils. Also how to make use of toothpaste for hair products. Downfall was probably getting hit on by a murderer. Only me.
A special kind of bond is formed between two people when they act as a pee shield for one another for drunken pisses in an alleyway
Why did I wake up to a snap chat of myself drinking beer out of a blender?
Vibrator fell off the top of the dresser and hit me. This might be the most embarrassing black eye incident ever
I look like a hot mess, emphasis on the hot now, more emphasis on the mess later
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