I failed the drunk obstacle course of trying to find my bed... consolation prize... a sore ankle and "disappointed' parents.
neither the pictures you took nor my hangover explain why there are skittles in my shoe
And whoever invented the condom should be put to death.
he found my favorite bra, 3 thongs and a pair of jeans and gave them back. i love move out day.
i just got drunk dialed and its 10am. clearly finals are over.
Got a personal ride from safe ride. I was crying so hard. The driver said think of something happy and I said Disney. In which I sang him Aladdin. So I got home ok
Also, we just got yelled at by a cop for being awesome...or making out in a fountain. Whatever.
Hes a nice guy and all but I'm only interested in his drunken alter ego.
Last thing I remember is beer bonging sangria. Dear God.
Nothing is creepier than a guy telling you "I was just thinking about you" in a men's bathroom when taking a shit
They wouldn't let me on the bull because I couldn't even sign my own name... She let me try 3 times...
he kept insisting he didn't have my number, so i called his phone and my number came up as "yeaaaaaaaaah!"
I'm naked in a forest ranger station right now
I HATE HIM SO MUCH I HOPE HE GETS IN SOME WEIRD ACCIDENT WHICH MAKES IT IMPOSSIBLE FOR HIM TO NUT
I should have known when she said it would be "fun" we'd end up in the hospital
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