dude last night I threw my weed into my back yard. there is now a foot of snow. after an hour I found my weed. if I put that effort into school, i'd have a 4.0.
Hu mahhiw im so tired.i just got done. In fo dleepu. Aaaaaaahh. I qisj my mom filmed me. In axtunf so funny
I brought his matress to the living room we're laying on it listening to rick james drinking vodka
he went at my nipples like a starved dog.
So I found where you barfed in my house. Just wanted to let you know that my cat barfed on the kitchen floor in a show of solidarity
I really want to throw this drink in your face but it was 6 dollars that shits expensive
Do you think if i wear this shirt with my bengals boxers this kid will fall out of love with me a little bit because that's what I was going for.
Where did you go?
I'm not really sure. They have flavored vodka. I like it and I'm never leaving. Ever.
I have bruises from doing the splits on the poles, if that doesn't scream bourbon street regret then I don't know what does
Do u remember giving me permission to fuck ur dad and then getting super pissed at me when i said ew?
I made out with a girl because I wanted to get in the VIP section of the bar because they have these big comfy couches. It worked.
the fact that you beer bonged rum made me so proud, the fact that you threw up an entire footlong tuna melt after... not so much babe
I got the security footage. Thank you boobies!
No just a list of 20 of my favorite things
Where are penises on the list
Where am I on the list
Under penises
Drunk twilight is the only twilight
Randomize
