i want to be waterboarded, just to see what all the fuss is about
I showed my boss the "She Wolf" video. He sent it to all his friends and told me to make us martinis...thanks Shakira and keep it up
He's the biggest piece of shit to ever exist. He's not even wearing shoes.
And it looks like I sent you 4 failed attempts at the word "hey." Sorry about that.
she slipped a pinky in my ass. Not sure if I came because I liked it or if I was terrified by it.
Between the dance party in the car and the distraction of the momma bear and two cubs im a cops wet dream roght now when comes to wreckless driving.
You have all been randomly chosen to participate in a new game called: how high was I? If you have any information about this or about where my clothing items went give me a shout. Thanks an good luck.
I just ate powdered extacy out of my wallet. I think I might have for a second of my reasonable life been on your level.
We're 17 hours into a 3 day weekend, and he's already shitfaced. He fell of the dock TWICE and insisted on wearing a life jacket on dry land.
Did she owns a vibrator that will set off seismic activity.
I'm kinda surprised he wouldn't be honored to take me back as a fuck buddy.
i woke up this morning put my hand under the pillow and there was a banana there
She's sent me the same nudes using the same gestures and positions... It's like she has a template for her sluty-ness
just so it's not awkward when you get here, you and my dog have the same name.
Hahaha nice
I could not add him. He gets 5 likes on Instagram.
Randomize
