he's chasing his jose cuervo with hot tub water
Bt dubs, I still have cuts on my arm from when you attacked me with a dildo on Saturday night.
there needs to be a build-a-bong store...
she's like bobby knight all she does is scream and point
My mail consisted of a box of dildos and christmas card from grandma.
Omg just remembered. I tried to kidnap a dog.
Got to the gym, getting changed, found a jello shot in my shoes.
Typing up notes at the bar and doing shots with the bartender until close on a Wednesday. This is what my second year of law school has become.
My backyard is filled with beer cans. You idiots turned our backyard into a redneck ball-pit
Her tits are absolutely massive. Like ripleys believe it or not shit
I was a plus one at an intervention for a person I didn't know.
He told me that if he broke my bed my bed durring sex he would take me to ikea, but only on Monday because it's all you can eat meatballs. I think I'm in love.
Is it possible to hurt your vagina working out, because I think my Dumbass accomplished that... 😯😟😒😓
Do I even want to know?
Not my lover. I would rather lose all my teeth, and I fucking love my teeth.
The Lion King Is on YouTube
Until 2 minutes ago I actually had a chance to pass my midterms... thanks alot
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