I just came so hard I farted. Twice. Thank God I'm alone.
I'm afraid that if I tell my sister I think Zachary Quinto is gay I'll have to put her on suicide watch for the next week or so
why does hillary duff have a greatest hits album?
He asked me to sit on his face, but i didnt, for 2 reasons, one, i had just pooped like 20 mins before sex, and two, this could be my future husband. so i skipped on sitting.
had to ask my 13 year old sister if she knew any dealers... she did. it's good to be home.
I had the spins so badly it was like I was having sex with 2 girls
I just remember her telling me "Hi, my names Kaissa and I'm a lesbian" over and over and over and over again as I was crying.
I just ate a can of beans for dinner so I can afford to go get a 5$ bottle of wine. I really did not think these choices would still be necessary at age 25.
Do you think making a dress out of an "Open" flag that my friend stole from a bar, and wearing it out sends the wrong message? ....Or exactly the right message?
We could all 3 jump out of a cake in just tophats. A true marble cake.
Calm the fuck down fatty, you can add creme de menthe to a vanilla shake any time of the year
fuck that its my house. if i want to take 1 bite out of the chicken & leave the rest i fucking will. suck my dick
good news: smoking weed at school again, quality of life has improved drastically
We were just getting out tux's at men's warehouse he pulled both of the fitting room girls. I dont think he should be getting married
The REAL engagement ring is the jeweled butt plug.
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