Honestly there's alot of things I'm confused about the only thing I know for certain about last night is that I ate pizza
then the nurse gave me a bag with my personal belongings: phone, wallet. jacket, keys and a BTB burrito
alright so where did all these fingerpaintings on my bedroom wall come from?
dude. you drew those with your dick
I came home drunk to my night light on and a Hershey's bar on my bed. Mom knows me too well.
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I was the one passing out cake at the bars
Housekeeping just called to see if we were okay bc they came in the room earlier and we didn't move.
and he should realize what an amazing ex i am for encouraging my best friend to hook up with him
He paid me to blow him while doing a handstand. Does that make me a whore or just a budding gymnast?
I spent a lot of time in their kitchen cause I was convinced that the living room was gonna fall... Sorry for not warning you about that.
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Was it just me or did you also find it awkward when "glad you came" started playing on pandora right after you finished?
im dying and naked and this is what youre living with next year.
he appreciated my fucking vagina for two hours he can appreciate my honesty
Idk... he wears anklets.. i dont think i can get past that.
I'm a grown ass woman. Treat me like one. Fuckboy
We're at an agreement where I don't pry and she pretends blissful ignorance
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