So she puts out... but it wasn't worth it
trsut me youll find me, im the only kanye west here and every1 is chanting dbag at me
I lost of the blow last night. Found it later in my bag labeled Fairy Dust.
NBC reported that a group almost has enough signatures to submit pole dancing as an Olympic sport in 2016...
God I fucking love America.
Omg!!!! Call me in the morning I just saw A stripper queef out a dollar
My broken door handle makes it really inconvient for when i need to puke at red lights.
Dude, I'm importing a boy from Oklahoma for my divorce party. It's like doctors without borders, but with dicks.
I mass texted 4 of you for a booty call. Please reply all when responding so only one of you shows up. Last one is a rotten egg.
I had so much drainage I couldn't moan properly. Fuck allergy season
That's why we don't trade sex for Taco Bell. It's called the dollar menu.
I am a 5'4" ball of sexual frustration and vodka. It is that kind of night.
He doesn't drink liquor so instead of doing a body shot off my belly button he dropped water in there and sipped it out with a straw. Look at my face: =|
Explaining that I bought them at a strip club gift shop with my friend didnt make the furry handcuffs seem less weird
When you woke up the first word out of your mouth was "whoa"
I was feeling the aftermath of his penis
thanks for passing me through your vagina 20 years ago today. your the best
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