So are we goin out tonight?
Dude, we woke up in your car in some parking lot last night...
And that was fun, wasn't it?
i just fell asleep at my computer and i woke up and in the google bar it said delicious foods to eat
his genitalia just looks like a thumbs up. a really really small thumbs up.
My passouts and memory loss are great training for when I have alzheimers. You'll know where to look when I get lost.
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I'm handcuffed to your bathroom sink. Save me.
Might just stay in and drink cuz of the hurricane. Yea I think Wisconsin might be safe but its a good reason to drink.
I wish Samuel L. Jackson would narrate our bar crawls
Drunk me Does not appreciate a drunk, naked you kicking me off the couch at 3am. You have a bed here, you dick
I was a battlefield of empty bottles and bodies. We though we won, but the booze had the last laugh.
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Get you some cowboy.
In that sentence you are the cowboy. That is not saying you should get a cowboy for yourself.
How drunk is "too drunk" for candlelight service?
This morning i put band aids over my nipples bc i was too lazy to put on a bra. Think I've reached a new low.
I don't remember his name. I had whataburger on my mind and in my hands so I wasnt really listening
I don't think he understands that his kid doesn't bother me. I have a binder full of developmentally appropriate early childhood activities.
Either go for divorced men who are forty plus or stop doing this immediately. You are 23 years old. You need more wine and less baby fever
We had sex and then ordered pizza after. This relationship is looking good so far.
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