Miserable. My projectile vomit just woke me up from a 5.5 hour nap.
You coming bye my yot got egg sweet carilne vodklaa
I'll make a Jello mold of your face so everyone can get drunk off your face
I'm mad at him and disappointed with you. It's like I put a bunch of effort into a PowerPoint of "what not to do with Zach" to show you and the first bullet point was "do not love him" and you're just disregarding all my effort and friendship.
I have to make mistakes myself to learn from them
FUCK YOU I AM MAKING A POWERPOINT
I'll come hang out with you guys later, but right now my parents aren't home and I have to take full advantage of being able to watch porn on full blast.
oh the usual. high as balls and crying about the hunger games.
How do you get kicked out of 3 different Subways in one night..
Not very gracefully, that's how.
All I can think about are the cheese it's on my desk at work this morning. Like are those apologetic cheese it's or does he seriously think he still has a shot..
You were drunk at 5 You went to the dining hall and cried because your brain and fingers weren't working. Your RA came up to you and suddenly you became sober. I was very proud of you.
We have GOT to stop getting stoned and going out for expensive dinners.
So vagazzling was a success
WE ARE DOOMED.
And not the good kind of doomed. Assuming there is one.
it isn't the robot apocalypse that's for sure
Good dick will make you do a lot of things… Great dick will make you consider buying a house.
IM ON THE WEIRD DRUGS AND I JUST SAW THAT TOM HARDY THING NOW I WANT TO HUMP
What a weekend. It started with me realizing i might not be straight and ended with me spraining my foot.
Randomize
