tfor prom could you pick me up wo bottles of champagne and a condom, please?
How can i ever say i miss u when u wont go away
You look at her and you just know the only action she's gotten is from her tampon..
And then he asked the cop "shall i shut off the lady gaga?" as he was being frisked.
I seriously fake cumming more than i poop.
You were dancing on the bar and fell off into the arms of the hot bartender. It was like a fairy tale, with more alcohol.
He's a good guy, we stopped by his old church.
And you didn't burst into flames?
Apparently having him hold an open book in front of me while i'm blowing him doesn't count as studying...
He played a tape of his mad rapping skills after the final...his rapper name was Mad Stylz and he rapped about all the pussy he got in the 90's. I love Sociology.
she called for a booty call so i sent mike as my stunt double
good it was pretty cute, also what would bong water do to a puppy?
Pretty sure I can show you the text you sent me stating some interest in my penis entering your mouth if said circumstances were met.
Shit. I'm suppose to call the bank but I'm too high to talk numbers.
My mom comes home from her weekend with her lesbian co-workers and asks "You wanna know how I got these bruises?" I've never been more torn about anything EVER.
I came on her face and asked if she wanted fries with that. Currently driving to McDonald's.
Randomize
