Uhhh...do I owe you any money? Or an apology? Or anything?
They say you shouldnt they say its no good for the environment in your vagina
I was giving him head and when I deep throated him he screamed out "Ohh, top ten!"
how do you say "fuck me and leave bruises" in italian?
i think i just put your shirt on , but i don't remember . my body can't decide if it wants to move in slow motion or fast forward
NO YOU'RE NOT. I don't want to hear that SHIT. Jameson appreciation day part 1 is saturday and YOU WILL BE READY.
Was I shouting at a fire engine last Friday?
i was debating whether to load antoher bowl when i realized i was holding a sandwich in one hand and a cookie in the other. and laughing.
Donating $10 to Sandy victims for every hurricane I drink tomorrow. Buying me alcohol just became a good cause.
I don't think you understand what laundry day means. I am wearing a swimsuit as underwear and my spanish club tshirt from junior high
I mean honestly, what would you have done?
Not screw her in the church house?
He thought I was gay. I had to explain I just really like wearing flannel.
I hope a pyrotechnic goes off in your asshole and seals it shut for life.
Me too.
As a rule...I don't sleep with my friends or watch movies with talking dogs
HIGH AS FUCK. JUST WATCHED THE TRIPPIEST VIDEO EVER. IM NOT SCARED OF PANDAS. I GOTTA GO. TRIPPIN AGAIN
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