Looks like an M-80 went off in a lb. of pastrami
you ran down to the water at 3am and rolled in the sand and ran around screaming that you were the corn dog monster.
I puked in the pool and didn't tell them, then they all went swimming. Is it dick to just sit back and enjoy the show?
Theres been so much buildup for our genitals to meet, one or both of us is sure to be disappointed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
im wtih 32a right now bc 34d is on her period. now i know how girls feel when their hookups go from magnums to regulars
Some chick is drunk waving down a taxi with a slice of pizza.
Nm. Exausted and my teeth just fell out again
My dick hurts from so many people grabbing it last night. We're not going back to that club
Hey my dad gave me life the least I can do is take him chicken strips and a pack of marlboros.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just want to slap everyone in the face that's happy being sober. Loser.
I accidentally sent a snap of my puss with the Republican filter... Totally killed his boner
Kinda suprised you didn't immediately ask about the lesbian ghosts tho
So I sniffed too hard this morning before work and I THINK THE COCAINE JUST STARTED ROUND 2.
If he has a beard, chances are, that’s an open invitation to sit on his face
I can’t believe you’re letting her use the Mercedes
It seemed like a better idea while she was giving me a hand job. It’s a good thing we weren’t having sex. Who knows what I would agree to during sex
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