You know how britney does the hair flip too much in her new videos? Thats me right now
Is it awkward that I've slept with every guy in this room?
Only if they know about it too.
How was last night?
She looked like Delta Burke in her fat Designing Women days ... and she just left like 2 minutes ago. Right after breakfast.
so I was thinking like, Rob Pattinson could make so much money whoring himself out dressed as Edward Cullen.
yeah, I mean if he's down to fuck a lot of fat chicks and stare at Tiger Beat posters of himself above the bed...
When i light up a cigarette people look at of like i'm going to pee on their children.
I just paid $5 for a shot of el toro and the bartender wasn't even hot. Rock bottom.
Can you explain to me how i got kicked out of a bar last night, from outside the bar?
I decided that Calgary can keep my underwear. They earned it.
I have bruises on the inside of my thighs from sliding down the stair case...thanks for encouraging that slut show
i'm covered in glitter and body paint WTF
We're showing the video later bring pizza
If I stopped mid-sex because the guy was hung like a light switch, it doesn't count, does it? Like the five second rule.
Also Fuck you Stephen King and Fuck the horse you rode in on, making me cry In front of my coworkers.
And you hate the library
Yea but I love drugs and my grades
I think sunday funday got a little out of control. There is cheese slices and BBQ sauce all over the roof and 4 empty bottles of vodka in my room.
I love Texas men! TSA agent found my vibrator, nodded approvingly, and said, “You have a nice night, ma’am” with a cowboy accent. I almost made out with him on the spot
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