Texts From Last Night

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  (502): View more from Kentucky

  everytime i listen to a chris brown song and like it i feel like i bad person

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  (502): everytime i listen to a chris brown song and like it i feel like i bad person http://tfl.nu/7xqj
  Replies (37) Good night (1009) Bad night (2226)
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  (512): View more from Texas

  do people in england often walk their sheep on leashes? or is this guy the exception to the rule?

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  (512): do people in england often walk their sheep on leashes? or is this guy the exception to the rule? http://tfl.nu/7un4
  Replies (41) Good night (6904) Bad night (690)
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  (501): View more from Arkansas

  All I remember is drinking vodka out of tupperware.

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  (501): All I remember is drinking vodka out of tupperware. http://tfl.nu/9chk
  Replies (5) Good night (4493) Bad night (841)
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  (515): View more from Iowa

  Doing "bucket stands" with buckets of margarita. Don't tell me it's not a good idea.

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  (515): Doing "bucket stands" with buckets of margarita. Don't tell me it's not a good idea. http://tfl.nu/mtdi
  Replies (6) Good night (3163) Bad night (791)
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  (914): View more from New York

  Theres just something about looking at pictures of your dick in church that doesn't feel right

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  (914): Theres just something about looking at pictures of your dick in church that doesn't feel right http://tfl.nu/mx4p
  Replies (18) Good night (1659) Bad night (4035)
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  (985): View more from Louisiana

  shut up i haven't hooked up with anyone since 45 minutes ago

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  (985): shut up i haven't hooked up with anyone since 45 minutes ago http://tfl.nu/00sj
  Replies (20) Good night (6352) Bad night (1232)
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  (847): View more from Illinois

  I'm walking down the street with a Starbucks in one hand and a flask in the other. People seem to have a staring problem

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  (847): I'm walking down the street with a Starbucks in one hand and a flask in the other. People seem to have a staring problem http://tfl.nu/9xlk
  Replies (16) Good night (5379) Bad night (1110)
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  (416): View more from Toronto

  I can hear my liver begging me not to go out tonight

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  (416): I can hear my liver begging me not to go out tonight http://tfl.nu/k1ij
  Replies (7) Good night (3753) Bad night (1339)
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  (720): View more from Colorado

  I told him "thank you for wearing a turtleneck yesterday, I no longer have a strong erg to have sex with you. " He is no longer speaking to me.

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  (720): I told him "thank you for wearing a turtleneck yesterday, I no longer have a strong erg to have sex with you. " He is no longer speaking to me. http://tfl.nu/g7lo
  Replies (22) Good night (3622) Bad night (1217)
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  (732): View more from New Jersey

  I'm chugging Gatorade because i drank something called a trashcan and someone named Gianna diamond has my credit card number, and I think I might have ruined my life.

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  (732): I'm chugging Gatorade because i drank something called a trashcan and someone named Gianna diamond has my credit card number, and I think I might have ruined my life. http://tfl.nu/df5q
  Replies (11) Good night (1070) Bad night (3192)
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  (307): View more from Wyoming

  Don't worry, your car is safe with me. I am throwing watermelons out of it at mailboxes and hipster kids.

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  (307): Don't worry, your car is safe with me. I am throwing watermelons out of it at mailboxes and hipster kids. http://tfl.nu/60tn
  Replies (15) Good night (3260) Bad night (720)
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  (305): View more from Florida

  The amount of drugs I did this weekend make me concerned about my health but at the same time fascinated to see if I could do more

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  (305): The amount of drugs I did this weekend make me concerned about my health but at the same time fascinated to see if I could do more http://tfl.nu/xgx0
  Replies (6) Good night (517) Bad night (333)
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  (410): View more from Maryland

  I apologize for tapping your ass. It was a friendly tap. Like Casper. Ya know

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  (410): I apologize for tapping your ass. It was a friendly tap. Like Casper. Ya know http://tfl.nu/wl8q
  Replies (3) Good night (543) Bad night (260)
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  (217): View more from Illinois

  I have six new people in my phone that I don't remember adding. One of them is "Bourbon Yeah." Successful evening?

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  (217): I have six new people in my phone that I don't remember adding. One of them is "Bourbon Yeah." Successful evening? http://tfl.nu/9mh6
  Replies (0) Good night (601) Bad night (210)
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  (410): View more from Maryland

  I was driving around a golf cart with a keg in the back before I got caught by the cops. First slow speed chase ever

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  (410): I was driving around a golf cart with a keg in the back before I got caught by the cops. First slow speed chase ever http://tfl.nu/pekg
  Replies (1) Good night (484) Bad night (189)

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