Yeah and Nick is shooting his loaded 9mm in his backyard.
if you made me into a cookie and threw me into a betty crocker easy bake oven on christmas morning...that's how baked i am
I love reading their "i love you more" , "no i love you more" war on facebook today knowing that he hooked up with me last night. I bet i know who wins that one.
Party at my house. Liquor pinata. Your presence is required.
I miss being able to drink at 11am just cause it was sunny outside.
I have hooked up with someone in EVERYONE OF MY CLASSES.
That's how you know you deserve to be a senior
After he finished his girlfriend called him. I sat there, tied his shoes for him, then he high fived me and said "this is gonna be a great summer steph"
Good idea. You gotta take care of your vagina. She takes care of you. Pay it forward.
I was expecting a blowjob when she shoved me in the bathroom but instead she shaved my pubes into a mustache for my penis. I am still satisfied.
Theme for your birthday? Beer olympics in S&M costumes? Sounds like a nice little saturday
A guy in the dance floor is raising the roof with an axe in hand. I love Halloween.
I am making it a rule that only people I am comfortable around enough to not have to put a bra on are allowed for Sunday funday. I think that's a good rule for someone who started drinking alone at noon while everyone else here sipped their coffee.
She has "Massive Shits" listed as a turn off. That's very specific and there's a story behind it I bet.
Sweet, got a date tomorrow night
That makes 14 Xmas cards already! Middle aged people are really nice to their dealers.
He was telling me about how he's leaving on his Mission next week... While we were having sex in the back of his car.
Randomize
