Also...you were trying to touch his balls without him noticing
The UPD just told me that he was going to call the cops if i try to run. you owe me 5 dollars, i told u they arn't real cops
He once got bit in the face by a dog and still got laid the same night. He owns Memorial Day Weekend
Theres a picture of me with cut up clothes rolling in the policeman's lawn, I missed you, summer.
Im in his room watching him sleep. Im going to try and jerk off and not get caught by the nurse.
I'm confused are we getting high or did someone actually die?
If I have to go to the hospital, at least put my pants back on. It's been a fantastic night.
Can I interview you during sex or would that be weird?
How do you respond to a booty call from yesterday?
His last name was woodcox? That just screams I've got a great penis
I saw him and didn't have sex with him. Responsibility five!
We joked about how funny it would be if he got pulled over with 300 breakfast burritos in hus car. We walk outside of the school just as the police lights turn on and pull him over
We are all yelling at the cat at our apt in nothing but our underwear. How do you think it's going.
I'm super disappointed in my clit.
I can't believe just smoked out of a pear
I can't believe you had a pear already made to smoke out of, that was impressive
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