hey call me
can't. in the shower.
... and this is probably why your phone does not work half the time.
I can't believe believe she called me a slut. She doesn't know anything about me or my life.
Shit, that's something a lot of sluts say.
remind me next year to leave the 19 year old girl at home when you're going to pride. total cock block
I think she just tried to waterboard me with her vagina.
I just found a receipt from ace where I bought 1 lrg plastic funnel, 2ft of 1" plastic tubing, and a 48" toboggan sled. Thank you cashier #552 for letting that poor life decision happen.
I know its been a few months but you must know you hve the 2nd biggest dick I've ever seen. 1st place went to a rapper so don't feel bad.
Don't let me forget to bring the toilet inside tonight.
please visit steve this weekend, he is getting mature and responsible and shit which scares me.
DUDE, DID YOU KNOW YOU CAN JUST RENT AN ELEPHANT???
Oh God.
I screamed "I want dick!" in the middle of the intersection. So many hot guys. I wish you were here.
Apparently I tried my hand at mustard juggling. I wasn't very good.
Let's play "Guess What I Just Found In My Vagina?"
I got to walk around for eight hours wearing power armor and acting camp. No way I wouldn't love it.
So who left their underwear on a lamppost in my aunt's backyard
Quickly hiding the condom wrappers, ropes, and handcuffs right before the parents arrive to help with moving out? Priceless.
Randomize
