i have no concept of time, i feel my nose, and im seeing everything in bitty hexagons.
We just licked a sour creme and onion chip for salt for a tequila shot. Our vacation has officially begun.
Just violated the laws of fuck-buddyship and talked to him about my personal life. I don't like it.
I am literally missing a chunk of eyelashes. That's how fun it was.
looking at my texts from you makes me want to throw up in my pants
I woke up on karas dogs bed. Lets evaluate our lives.
'lets look at pictures of your friend's new baby' was probably the worst post-sex idea we've ever had
I told my doctor about us having twin chlamydia
Whatever. That's why I am to be babied like a calf. I regret nothing.
Also, being stuck with my family all week has made it very clear that I need to be drunk and I need to be fucked pronto
this is the last time i am going to a 7am booty call
It will be the shitshow of all shitshows.
Banged a guy with 2 broken arms once. Top that
Just finished 151. Eating nutella off a spoon. Bring condoms.
I wonder how vigorously I can jack off in a one person tent without being noticed???
Randomize
