whats the proper etiquette for returning a closet door to a random girl you met and do not know her name?
So... he formspringed me a link to every nude pic ive taken since he 8th grade. ive evolved nicely. but im nervous as to how this a website.
throwing up in the shower isnt as glamorous as i expected
since when the fuck is that glamorous?
We stole a cat. That is all you need to know.
She fell down the stairs and hit her head on the concrete. Then she stood up, flashed us and stumbled away. I forgot to get her number..
Do you remember unrolling paper towels as a blanket?
Just did a keg stand the dropped my phone in the toilet. Sorry for partying.
You did a keg stand on the toilet?!
Well, we won the drunk before noon contest!
I'm taking a dab in mourning of how long its been since I smoked with you guys.
Like I would feel weird too if you just cancelled our wedding, cut off all your hair and started twerking everywhere
Just went to my first strip club and they had Fox News on. Conservative booty time.
I mean it's a good blow job, but it's not worth the four hour round trip.
I got so many dick pics last night. It was like a slideshow from heaven.
I threw up through my nose tonight. Happy cinco de mayo
I miss you.
Yeah, I don't want to have sex.
Randomize
