Haym$ered
turn off your phone and go to bed
I told him it was like a man's penis, but smaller.
spell your last name, im trying to find you on facebook
We pinky-swore to never fuck each other again.
HAPPY NEWYEARSM FAGTRON! GETTING HEAD IN TAXI I WIN
Shot gunning beers for breakfast. You better be ready for today.
Tell me right now I did the right thing by not fucking my sick gf at 3 am with her family home... Tell me my balls hurt for noble reasons.
Luckily my prof thought I was puking from nerves and gave me motivational mini speeches the entire final.
I took a few sips of my hugeee bottle of liquid Vicodin and smoked my one hitter and now I'm going thru my attic like Indiana Jones
The sigh of relief when u realize none of your drunk texts will result in permanent damage
After that time I came to the conclusion that jeeps are the best cars to have sex in
He pretended his dick was a samurai sword and that he was slaying me with it is it bad I still wanted him to fuck me
How awkward is it to have the guy you used to sleep with congratulate you on your engagement? I'll tell you. Very.
He has a penis. Therefore, he counts.
You laid on the floor and pet their rug. and then demanded Voss water.
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