Ok so serious question: if one wanted to say the plural of mongoose, would it be mongooses or mongeese?
I wish i could call my weed and hear it ring. That's how i found my phone.
Every day I regret the life decisions that led me to bank management and NOT being a coke addicted stripper. Every. Single. Day.
I would explain the ketchup stains in the bed to him but saying I just got my period is so much less embarrassing...
I feel the need to clarify that I did not show her my vagina.
Are they engaged or just dating? Girlfriends come and go but the memory of sex at the pool last forever.
oh come on since when have relationships been boundary lines for us
fair point
Hes trying to fuck me on a bear rug. Not saying no.
We were Chugging coronas for the soul purpose of launching limes out of the 3rd story window, I'd say it was a good weekend
We tried to do sophisticated last night, but our low class kept shining through.
Two things. 1) party at my house this Friday 2) what was the name of the Australian you fucked on the cruise ship?
my dry spell has ended & now it's like a tsunami of dick i can't handle it
I can see their wedding vows now: 'Til basicness do us part
Made out with some dude at the bar last night. Was fun until he thought bohemian rhapsody was by The Who
Jesus fucking Mary Christ if I have to clean shit out of my fucking bathtub one more fucking time I'm gonna murder a fucking kitten
Randomize