The elaphant ear plant popped a new leaf ! Wahoo !
Laziness has reached now heights if you too unmotivated to buy pot
Just gave advice in krystal burger while holding and pointing with a corona to a 3 year old, told her to enjoy her stroller time while it lasts. The mom pushed her away fast.
I used to practice getting hit by cars.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The sorority chicks were the Persian army, and we were their 300 Spartans. Can barely stand up now...such a good ratio
I wasn't going to take him home until I heard "hung like a water buffalo" then curiosity got the best of me.
I had a dream where I was about to fight you but you were dressed like a greek god and had just killed a werewolf with your bare hands
That commercial was clearly aspirational. I think Arbor Mist would pair nicely with Oscar Meyer
Then he claimed me as his prize for 3rd place in a wing eating contest. Too romantic.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He told me he needed "space" but then goes and likes my insta of panacakes.. Done.
Hung out near hay bales in sweaters then she gave me a pumpkin spice pop rocks bj. That was so freakin' seasonal.
Someone took a shit in the house somewhere and I STILL can't find it. I'm just going to move.
I touched a dick in church today
Omg no hes gotta go down on me. Then itll be like my vagina has kissed the stanley cup.
You went outside, peed in the front yard, and asked me to bring you some toilet paper.
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